As a pastor, like any of us, I need to keep my human nature in check. Yes, God’s grace, His forgiveness, and His guiding presence of the Holy Spirit are all definitely real, and felt, but my human nature is also real. This is part of keeping in perspective who I am as a human, in light of who God is. The last time I cut my finger, yeah, it bled. The last time I looked in the mirror, yeah, the gray hairs were still showing up. And yeah, I get depressed, sad, angry, etc.                        
    Again, in my role as a pastor, it is very important for me to keep my human nature in check. People typically look to pastors with a higher expectation or standard in mind.
    Lately I’ve been noticing that I need to watch my tongue closely. James 3:3-5 of the Bible reads, “When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal around . . . Likewise the tongue is a small part of the body but it makes great boasts . . . With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God’s likeness.” No, I don’t have much of a personal problem with uncontrollable cursing or profanity as I'm angry or in conflict. But I do need to watch my tone and my use of words more carefully. 
    A few weeks ago, Vivian came to our Care Center to visit and to receive a small gas voucher for her vehicle. Vivian was doing good at a lot of things --- parenting as best she could, working full-time at the same job she’s had for over a year, being in a strong relationship with God. But she was making some poor financial decisions in the purchase of a vehicle that was even making it hard for her to buy food for her family and to pay her apartment rent. While I brought out that truth, I didn’t “sandwich” it with affirmation for the many good things she’s doing. She corrected me; I apologized; she left discouraged; I felt bad. Fortunately I was able to see Vivian two days later so I could offer apology again, some more affirmation, and appreciation for her willingness to be bold in correcting me. (They say it takes 10 statements of encouragement to override 1 statement of discouragement.) It wasn’t that I lacked compassion, but I expressed it in a condescending way.
    I need to watch myself in my role as a father, too. One morning I told my oldest daughter to clean out her dog’s pen after school. Later in the day, my wife called to say my daughter was almost in tears because she couldn’t quite get it all cleaned out as “it” was frozen to the ground (December in South Dakota), and she thought Dad would be mad. I felt bad that my tone of voice in the morning must have given her that impression.
    Ah, my humanity, not something to just excuse --- “well, I’m human too” --- but, for my own peace, for the peace and hope of others, and to God’s glory, to keep in check.

    I write this feeling frustrated and confused by what we human beings will do to ourselves to escape reality, or to fill a void in our life. Drinking too much alcohol can do this; it can take a person out of reality for a while. Sadly, the consequences are often painful --- the least of which is probably a hangover. Noah, who was usually an exemplary man of God early in the Bible (Genesis 5-9), once used alcohol to escape life for a while. It worked, but with the result  of a lot of “pain” for his family. In his drunkenness he lay naked and exposed. His youngest son Ham saw his father laying there but he didn’t cover up his father’s embarrassment. Rather, Ham told his brother’s Shem and Japheth about it, and they appropriately covered up Noah. When Noah sobered up, he blessed his sons Shem and Japheth, but he cursed Ham, saying, “Cursed be Canaan (Ham). The lowest of slaves will he be to his brothers.” For many years following that, Ham and his descendants were slaves. I’ve often wondered, Noah was the elder, the father in the family, the one who should know better. He went out and got drunk and then exposed his nakedness. Shouldn’t he be cursed? 
    This subject is fresh on my mind because of two recent incidents. Just the other night a 23 yr. old man named Dustin, drunk and driving too fast, lost his life as he drove his car into a tree. How sad. 
    Not too long ago, my “street friend” Rodney (age 40), tightly-gripped in an addiction to alcohol, stumbled toward me and fell into my arms full of sadness and very drunk. Crying, he slurred out how he sold himself for sex with another man in order to have $10 to buy some more booze. He shared how he felt dirty, used, worthless, and wanting to die as I drove him to a place to sleep it off.
    Drunkenness, drug highs and lows, sexual highs and lows, and other experiences are sometimes used to escape reality for a little while. How sad, in light of the fact that we as people, as mere human beings each have the natural capacity and ability to be in a personal relationship with God, the Creator and Maintainer of the world, and to be filled by Him. But also, how great, how hopeful, for each person! 
    Let Him fill the voids in our lives with peace and purpose. Let’s escape to Him so He can help us through real life troubles and hurts, in contrast to foreign, rogue agents like alcohol, drugs, illicit sex, etc., which usually ultimately take away more than they give.   --- www.peacewithinreach.com by Fred Wilgenburg

    Willy came recently to a men’s Bible study that I was attending and he left early, angry and distraught. I soon followed to find out what was wrong. Willy, a bit intoxicated, started to share how he just couldn’t take it in there anymore --- this Jesus-talk from white men, “another thing you are trying to push on us Native Americans.” It’s not that the Bible study was being led disrespectfully; the leader is a gentle, soft-spoken 70 year old white man. The problem was, this talk of Jesus’ love and sacrifice, and encouragement to get to know Him is often done by white man-church that had persecuted Native Americans and severely disrespected their beautiful culture, certainly in the 19^th century, if not up through today.                    
    Willy and I talked about this. Though my ancestors are white, but immigrants within the last 60 years from Europe, I apologized to Willy on behalf of white man-Americans who severely abused his people then, and who continue to discriminate. As a pastor, I apologized on behalf of the Church. I don’t know if Willy and other embittered Native Americans will ever be able to fully forgive God’s church for the abuse, and for the disrespect, but I told Weldon that I hope he can be reconciled to God, to His Creator, who is, no matter who says it, all about grace, but also about justice. (It’s spoken about often in God’s Word, the Bible, including in Psalms 9:16-18, 11:7, 36:6.) I pray that Willy can distinguish between the God of the universe who doesn’t fail, and His Church of human beings who do fail. A good point is made by Pastor Rick Warren --- “Every church could put out a sign, ‘No perfect people need apply. This is a place only for those who admit they are sinners, need grace, and want to grow.’”
    Sincere believers --- those who have personally received the grace of God, especially as shared through Jesus --- should not act like they sometimes do, but we need to remember, they are still humans who sin and are saved by God’s grace. They are on a life-journey with God the Holy Spirit, but they certainly haven’t reached the destination of perfection yet. 
    Still, no excuses, God has given us so much --- forgiveness, promise of heaven, purpose and peace, daily guidance and counsel --- that we shouldn’t act like we do sometimes.
    Willy, I worship the one Great Spirit, Tunkashila, as well. Please don’t let the poor actions of your fellow man to throw you off from a personal relationship with that Life Giver, God, Tunkashila, who will not fail you.         --- by Fred Wilgenburg, www.peacewithinreach.com